JPAQ'08

Chao Tah.

Chao Tah in Body.

Chao Tah in Mind.

Chao Tah in Stamina.

I want to sleep.

Perspectives?

Is it all about perspectives? Not worth it. No point talking about such a controversial issue on line. In no time you will get flamed. It's just not worth it. It could be a friendship lost, simply by a stupid post, both in the blog and in the tagboard. But that would show how weak the friendship is to begin with. It's certainly not a place to argue because those who do not dare to speak up, would normally voice it out in the virtual realm. (AH! Please don't extract this statement independently and blow it up...) No wonder people put a password leading to their blog entry.

2 days with 59 of them. My perspectives have changed. Certainly not over the span of the last 2 days but the many weeks that led to this change. I hear similar issues everywhere I go. All because of comments passed by people. Words that were murmured over the microphone, in-class lessons, gestures and the like. I realised I grew up in such an environment too. Even now. I'm beginning to grow in great displeasure each time I observe its occurrences.

It's really not worth it. Makes me wonder if a blog is worthwhile. Makes me wonder if it's merely a place to pen ideas and thoughts. A place to emo? A place where your peers are 'allowed' to find out how you are? Plain ridiculous.

Well, if it makes someone happy to hear just the soothing words so as to feel good, then too bad it's not going to happen here. The truth needs to be said. And at times, blatantly, simply because being nice doesn't always help. While typing the preceeding lines, I can almost anticipate "but you need to do it tactfully...you need to be gentle and soft...don't be so mean la..."... This is not a place to argue. You may bring it up in the forum as a quote and fight it out there by yourself.

In fact, if I'm going to get flamed again, then... it has to be done tactfully too :)

I'm just going to play my part. And help them to play theirs. Not that they can't, but they need to know how to. I will do my part as best as I can as an Educator. I will go on as long as I have the strength. I'm tired of all these awful comments. If I can feel it as an adult, what more these students?

I wonder what I can do for grown ups. Maybe I should just keep quiet. Because adults are simply complicated beings. Maybe I'm not brave enough to endure those stares and responses. Maybe I'm not seasoned to withstand the 'kunai-s' flying from behind. Maybe I'm too sheltered to fight for myself. Maybe I'm just blessed with a job like this. Perhaps I should stop my attempt to stick my nose into matters which people want to keep hush so that they can carry on in a state of self denial. Sorry, I meant a state of denial.

Yes, I really should. But Not for these students. For them, I will stick my foot in every opened door. I will give up my seat for those who need it more than me, for those who are willing to listen, for those who are willing to change.

Ah yes, I see it clearer now. I am taking a step back, and taking a step forward too.

"It's just going to get harder from here..." - Facing the Giants.

Shiok & Smiling (SAS)

Well well, what do we have here... Seems like a HTC Dual Touch PDA.

Today's training was one of a kind. Honestly, I enjoyed myself and didn't have to raise my voice at all. The accoustics of the venue deny the use of a microphone. That was great. I felt like I was talking to a person, 1 to 1.

They are more than who they think themselves to be. Why doubt? Why not see possibilities? It's ENDLESS!

I'm about to get into blogging about work, nah... not here.



I was texting while the debriefing was taking place. While doing so, I received news that we have to pack up and leave the venue. Oh guess what, the Samsung U600 would allow me to text single-handedly while I can afford to carry my equipment on the other hand. Then I made a passing remark which made my colleague swing her bag towards me. I realised that I can no longer text with one hand because the new phone comes with a stylus and doesn't allow that to happen. THEN, I remembered the phone comes with a keypad! Ah ha! Now, I STILL can text single-handedly. No probs.

Yes, tis' the season to upgrade.

Buy new phone.
Get new mobile plan.
Get attached.
Make new relatives.
Get rejected.
Start jogging frantically.
Start earning all the money possible.

Whoopie!

No, except for the new phone and mobile plan, the others were merely random inputs. ;)

Whoopi

no more pending.

Fast & Furious

Oh?

"Correct me if I'm wrong"



1. Ugly
2. Personal Agenda
3. Pride, face value
4. Human Flesh
5. Seeing in the natural
6. I don't care less
7. Masks
8. Weekly routine

You can never hide what is beneath those masks

Overcrowding?

No... Yes, I do have a post on 'Overcrowding'. To date, 1 bee is pending approval. The other is injured. Rather, self-inflicted injury. Sorry for the 'straight to the heart' & 'tight' comment. Afterall, I'm also 'entitled to my opinions'. But hey! This is not the time to offend or further injure! This paragraph serves little no more than just to poke and insert some salt into wounds. Whoopie!

Ah, here we go.

Was in uncle's car until he hit the "ERP" gantry again. Dangerous, had he not stop in time, it would be another tay kecong incident at the SMU gantry. Ah, everyday-rob-people. Saw from this cab driver who openly demonstrated a stunt that literally set me in a short fuse as I witnessed how he went through the gantry without having his cashcard deducted! *eyes open wide*

Ah, don't ask me to teach you. I don't subscribe to such a method.

ERP was implemented for a simple cause: to help the citizens. Too many cars in town, so we got to curb the situation.

Oh come on, since when were any of the government-initiated strategies not meant to 'help the citizens'? And the passengers in the car were just lamenting on how crowded town is. For some reason it led to choosing a location to stay in Singapore. Staying in town might not be the best idea afterall. Yes, you can walk to office but it would mean squeezing with the crowd half the time. Having to wait along the streets just because someone in front stopped to look at handphone covers. Guess what... the government might just have the solution for this!

"To ease the crowded-ness and to prevent future congestions despite the failure of the ERP, we've unanimously designed a strategy that would effectively solve the problem of overcrowding in the long run." (Note: unanimously & long run)

"Let us introduce the EPP!" "Electronic People Pricing" :)

"For every street you roam, you are now required to pay a fee to cover the road depreciation, wear & tear, space coverage & our bonuses. If you weigh between 60-80kg (which is the general public's average BMI) then $2 is fine. Anything above that is consider heavy-moving vehicle and would require a higher fee such as $4. However, we do consider those below 60kg such as students or those who subscribe to a hobby called anorexic, you only need to pay a small sum of $1.50. Cheaper. Whatever the case, we just want to flush the money outta ya pockets :) Don't ask me any questions, I'm just saying what I'm told to say. Anything just speak to the father and son."

I got this hunch that we'll need to pay for stepping out of our homes in the near future.

I'm seriously thinking twice about getting a vehicle. What if they insist cyclists install a cashcard reader or some gantry unit?! Wah, I think I will start a revolt.

If Singapore is really that crowded, we might just become a high-class Bangkok someday.

ah... If it's too crowded, then go elsewhere. Make sure the standard of living there is equally good if not better :)

Sacrifices

Sacrifices make perfect sense when you know your vision.

They make even more sense when you know what they're worth



Without a vision, you purpose will come from the flesh.

Clone

Either one:

I need a clone.

OR

I need to rest.

I rather do guard duty

Stigma

Back to back trainings have taken a toll on me. No doubt it was physically tiring I cannot but smile at the pure fact of both mental and spiritual satisfaction. The spirit is willing but the flesh speaks otherwise. O how I struggle to stay afloat the weary body that seeks every possible minute of rest.

I do ponder, if I am almost weak in my mental strength or is it just mere fatigue setting in after an average of 7hrs training daily. It was a good 5 schools within a span of 2 weeks and hundreds of students to recount moments.

Every class has a story to tell. Every student has a dream to pursue. Every school has a culture to embrace. Yet, the sad truth of being in the last class more than often sinks deep into the hearts of youths who undeniably receive those peircing words from both peers and educators. I vividly recall my days as a secondary student as those words "lousy" & "please la, stop your nonsense" clearly echo in my mind still.

Can you just take a quick moment to imagine the tedious process of enduring this stigmism students struggle to live with daily? Having said all that, that process can happen both in school, and at home. Just take another quick glance at the amount of 'repair' needed for these youths to grow into fine young men and women, each embracing their destiny and fighting to make a difference in their own 'habitat'.

I am amazed at how fear, disappointed and doubts can quickly cloud the minds & hearts of people. Fear is learnt. Disappointed experienced. Doubts stem from the roots of fear. As a Trainer, I can only do this much. I provide you with the knowledge and hand you the keys to unlock those prison doors. I carry you through a journey of self discovery and understanding of both feeling and thoughts. I push you towards turning those knobs. Yet, it is not within my ability (neither is it right of me) to force you make that decision of change. Man can never manipulate that outcome, should it remain true and lasting.

O where shall I begin??

I feel troubled yet excited. Knowing full well the extend of Hope that can replace hopelessness in their hearts yet I can't explicitly declare what I should. Some of them said the session sounded like a 'cell group', some asked if I'm a Christian. One even asked if I'm from a particular mega church just because I sounded charismatic.

Ah yes, now I see some light. Now I see my role. Now I recollect the days of youth and how I looked up to others in my lives.

Abba, it's so exciting to journey on this given job with You. More MORE MORE!